Note: yeah, yeah, this is an off canon and off char fic and is probably quite stupid, but I know someone out theres gonna get a kick out of it.I know I dont know anything about Star Trek. Its just a fun little ficlet thing for everyones enjoyment. I dont own star trek and I am not making any money off of this.

The captain looked at the staggering transporter commander with a sharp eye. It was the second day he had shown up at his post drunk as a skunk. It was beginning to annoy him.

well Scotty, do you have the right coordinates?

Scotty blinked for a moment, looked down, blinked, and nodded. The captain sighed and cast a dubious glance to his partner Spock.

It isnt logical to let him beam us somewhere.

I know, I know, but hes the only one thats on duty today. Hes all we got.

No expression passed onto the Vulcans face so the captain once again looked at Scotty and nodded.

Beam us down Scotty.

They dissolved into a million tiny particles of light and arrived.

Alrighty Scotty, we have a very important political delegation to meet and--

Captain, it is not logical that you should go out right now.

And why is that Spo-- Said the captain, stopping mid step to the door. He looked down and saw that they were completely naked, save the Federation insignia lying on the ground next to them. The captain tried his best to cover himself up as he reached for the insignia on the ground. Tapping it, he yelled:

SCOTTY! THIS ISNT FUNNY! BEAM DOWN OUR CLOTHES NOW!

Laughing was heard on the other end.

The captain sighed, but was relieved when the tiny articles of light enveloped them once again brining them clothes. He stepped towards the door--

captain.

what is it now Spock? We have clothes!

Yes we do. But not the logical ones.

Captain Kirk looked at Spock and balked. There stood spock in a disconcertedly alluring lavender dress with high heels and a pair of earrings. Kirk looked down at himself and saw that he was in a not so flattering red dress that fit just a bit too tightly, red stilletto heels, dangly earrings, poofed up and permed hair, and a little vinyl red purse. His Federation insignia was pinned into his dress too. He reached to tap it, but the delegation he was supposed to be meeting was nearing the door. He tapped it in a last ditch effort.

SCOOOTTTYYYYYY!

It was too late. The door opened and in stepped the delegation.

I must say that was the msotIllogical and interseting political meetings that I ever attended.

yeah. It was wasnt it? Now help me get back up, these heels are killin me.